This is the trailer for ‘Vampires Suck’, yet another puerile satire along the lines of Epic Movie, Superhero Movie, and Scary Movie. I’m not saying those films aren’t funny, in a dumb teenage sort of way, but they certainly aren’t witty.
The trailer certainly doesn’t make this one out to be any different. It’s just making all the Twilight jokes the entire internet has already made (and only on a slightly larger budget, I’d guess). The point I’m driving at is that making fun of Twilight is like making fun of Britney Spears or some other poor, stupid individual.
Yes, we can make several jokes at its expense, but it’s hardly a challenge, is it? The poor writing and simplistic characters make it an easy target. Not only that, but holding true to the Britney Spears analogy, it’s probably made more money than any of us ever will.
If you look at previous vampire spoofs-using Dracula: Dead & Loving it by Mel Brooks as an example, which was particularly ingenious-there really is a lack of imagination in the humour. I’m not trying to defend Twilight, not at all-this article is as much an assault on the poor quality of the entire phenomenon, but when the movie that spoofs your franchise looks this terrible, it’s a clear indicator of the quality of the original product.
Vampires Suck just doesn’t have anything new to work with. There are only so many jokes you can make at the abysmal character development and hackneyed storylines of Stephenie Meyers’ abortive attempt at an undead saga. She’s made millions of dollars of off something a real writer would consider a basic frame for a novel, and I don’t begrudge her the money, I just weep for the people who’ve been suckered in by that drivel.
I suppose in essence it’s not Vampires Suck’s fault that it looks so bad when the subject matter itself is more like a spoof than an actual story. Twilight is a parody that forgot it was a parody and tried to make something serious of itself, which would make Vampires Suck a spoof of a spoof.
In my humble opinion, this film will go unnoticed. But in slightly happier news, this looks rather excellent-
Expect an article dedicated to this fantastic looking piece of cinema very soon.
-Laurence Braddow
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